Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls a.k.a. Fracking ALIENS!?!?!?!

Indiana Jones was awesome, until the ending. This review is going to be short and sweet because that’s all it deserves really. The movie is a very well made adventure romp that sits very comfortably next to the previous Indiana Jones pictures. Karen Allen is back as everyone’s favorite Indy love interest. Shia LaBeouf continues to take over the world one summer blockbuster at a time, and does an annoyingly good gob at it. (Also, check out the trailer for his new movie, Eagle Eye, it looks all kinds of AWSOME!!!)
In fact that was my favorite part of the movie; the relationships. The action is all well choreographed, and THANKFULLY it’s all very smoothly shot and edited and there is NONE of that annoying “shaky-cam” nonsense the Bourne films started (just to make it clear, I liked it in the Bourne films cause it fit the tone of what they were, much like I also love it in the series 24, however, not EVERYONE needs to shake the camera and think that immediately means “intense!”) but the action was a known, a given. The acting and relationships and dialogue was all much better than you’d expect and a true joy. Harrison Ford’s reaction to seeing Marion Crane after all these years is priceless, just sheer cinematic joy.
That brings me to the two things I didn’t like about the film. The first one is john Williams. That’s right I said it, the man is lazy. I know he’s old, but that’s no excuse. Remember all those countless memorably tunes he made in the 80’s and 90’s? REMEMBER them all? I don’t, I can’t, there are too many. Well, other than the Harry Potter theme, all he does now days is play tracks from his greatest hits album over everything he does. I LOVE the Indy theme, but I literally heard it 36 times During Crystal skulls. Indy gets a drink from the water fountain = dun dun dun Da dun dad um…Shame on you Williams, try being creative and not cribbing from your own past library!
Secondly, the ending. The last 20 minutes or so is so outlandish (even by Jones standards) I couldn’t take it. ALIENS!?!?! REALLY!?!?!?! It was lame and that’s all there is to it. Them talking about the aliens and their relationship to the ancient civilizations was fascinating, the idea of the crystal skull itself was great and cool, but the actual execution of it, well, the mummy was more believable, and the mummy is a rip off of Indiana Jones. Therefore, concordantly, ergo, visa VI, the ending sucked worse than a knock off…and that sucks. Got me? Good
The end